Marriage is awesome. Imagine having found that one person who makes you feel safe and secure and loved – one that will go through life’s hoops and journey with you, for better or for worse. That would simply be heaven on earth.

However, married people, especially those who have been together for a really long time sometimes complain about one thing – the relationship can get monotonous and boring. Marriage is work and it needs both people to choose to work on it every day.

There’s more to marriage, and relationships in general, than just sex. But certainly, sex and intimacy plays a big role, wouldn’t you agree? Here are some tips from RandyFox for better sex and a spicier relationship.

 

Exercise your kegels

Kegel exercise have a lot of benefits. But do you know that it can also help men? Yes! Both men and women can do kegel exercises because both men and women have pelvic floor muscles. Exercising kegels strengthens the pelvic floor and can lead to better sex. (Big bonus is that kegel exercises has a whole array of benefits than just in the sex department.) This is also easy and convenient to do because you can do them anywhere. Just don’t make any weird faces in public when you do them. LOL

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Schedule intimate time together.

When things get hectic as they sometimes will, the first thing that often gets sacrificed is intimacy. Understandably so, it can be hard to think about being intimate when either or both of you is super tired and stressed. But letting things like that for an extended period can be damaging to the relationship. Scheduling intimate time together can ensure that your sex life is not put on the back seat. Plus you can also make use of this and treat it as foreplay – it can give you both something to look forward to. Employ imagination to the build-up.

 

Intimacy over sex

Sex is fine. In fact, it’s great! But don’t put all your energy into the sex thing. It can put pressure on you and your partner if you do. As an effect, scheduling your intimacy might do more harm than good. Focus on building intimacy. Things don’t always have to end with sex. Build physical intimacy by cuddling or hugging or kissing and just conversing. You can also use this time as sort of a “fact-finding sex night” wherein you talk about what you do and don’t like sexually, discuss about new positions and sex moves you’d like to try, and talk about hidden fantasies.

 

Mutual masturbation

Masturbation is a good habit whether you are in an intimate relationship or not. It’s okay to agree you know, no judgments here. *wink* Also, let’s face it. No one else knows better how to do you than yourself. Have masturbation sessions. Do your self while your partner does him/herself. Incorporating masturbation into your foreplay allows you to take an active role in arousing yourself while showing your partner what and how you like it.

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Use sex toys

Adding sex toys to your intimate sessions can add a whole new layer into your fun and in your relationship. However, before taking a leap into this, especially if you and your partner don’t practice this, it is important that you talk about this first. Communicate openly about what you need. If either of you don’t know where to start, do your research together. Google is just a tap away.

 

Try different positions

Kama Sutra is your friend. It exists for a reason. Spice up your intimate play by trying different positions.

You can also look into some of our features for inspiration. Read up on RandyFox features on 7 Sex Positions to Switch it Up, Best Positions to Conceive, and 7 Spicy Kama Sutra Positions.

 

Dressup/Roleplay

Dressing up or doing roleplay may also do wonders for your sex life. If you are not into it or haven’t tried it before, it can be a little awkward at first. But who knows, you and your partner might discover hidden fetishes along the way. The important thing is you talk it out first. Communicate boundaries.

 

Consider opening up the relationship

Before you even talk about opening up the relationship first though, both of you have to be secure and sure. And when you do both decide to dive into this set-up, establish parameters of your set-up. It doesn’t have to be a permanent set-up. You both can discuss timeframe or number of people. Some couples find that opening up their relationship lead to better sex lives and can strengthen their connection to one another. But if this is not your cup of tea, that’s fine too. Don’t force yourself. Everything should be decided by the both of you.