What Netflix Sex Education Has Taught Us - Randy Fox

Who here loves talking about sex? Sex is an interesting topic; we’re sure anyone would agree. However, it feels like we are still walking on eggshells when discussing intimate matters related to it. As a matter of fact, teachings and media surrounding this carnal pleasure is so vague and ambiguous! Well, that is, until Netflix’s “Sex Education” came around, and what it has taught us are nothing short of mindblowing.

When the series aired on the streaming platform last January 11, 2019, it busted the doors wide open, allowing uncensored insight on sex education and the lack thereof. It was unafraid to put commonly-perceived taboo topics in the spotlight - from sexual dysfunctions, repercussions of unprotected sex, and even gender identity without being preachy. It had the perfect mix of comedy and serious wisdom, and we’re not the only ones who thought so. Rotten Tomatoes critics gave it a collective 91% rating, and that’s saying something!

So with all the rave reviews, what has Netflix’s “Sex Education” taught us?

The “Funny but True” Learnings

Like what we’ve mentioned, while the series educated us had hard-hitting lessons, it also had funny, unexpected ones. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t real! Here are just a few of them.

IMPORTANT NOTE: From here on out, tread lightly because this article is going to be full of spoilers!

Marijuana and Sexual Performance

Marijuana - Randy FoxDuring the first episode, Adam (Connor Swindells) was having problems with ejaculation. By some stroke of luck, he was paired with the main protagonist, Otis (Asa Butterfield), for a school assignment. Unwillingly, Otis invites him over his house to work on the task, and that’s when Adam realises his little secret - his mum, Dr. Jean Milburn (Gillian Anderson), is a sex and relationship therapist.

Jean arrives and begins to smoke cannabis with Adam, and the latter complimented the former for being a “cool mum.” Of course, Jean couldn’t help but “therapise” Adam, as if she had an idea that he had issues producing what she funnily calls as his “man-milk.” She explains that there are studies linking the use of marijuana with sexual performance. Adam bolts out, feeling guilty as charged. But is there any truth to that?

Apparently, yes! In an article that first appeared on Playboy, marijuana has a rather complicated relationship with sexual performance. While for some it works as a stimulator, there are some who experience the opposite. It acts as an inhibitor, causing erectile dysfunction and in some cases, difficulty reaching orgasm. There’s still plenty of study needed to confirm how it works, but it would be better to consult a doctor who knows your unique history and physiology.

Cranberry Juice and Thrush

Cranberry Juice - Randy FoxIn the second episode, Maeve (Emma Mackey), Otis, and Eric (Ncuti Gatwa) thought that if they wanted their “sex therapy” business to soar, they needed to rely on positive word of mouth. So they planned to give free advice during Aimee’s (Aimee Lou Wood) house party, where most of their school mates would be. Otis got to work, and, as expected, it was awkward. He even butted in a conversation, saying “cranberry juice cures thrush.” Funny, but is it true?

Again, there’s some truth to it! Drinking cranberry juice helps correct your urine’s pH levels, thereby preventing the growth of fungi that causes yeast infections. Because it deprives the fungi of the ideal environment to thrive, it can be a remedy to thrush. Now we know!

The Locked Snatch, Vaginismus

Couple in Black and White - Randy FoxEver since the alien erotica writer Lily (Tanya Reynolds) graced our screens on episode three, she has been constantly throwing herself at anyone who has a penis just so that she can “get it over with.” Finally, she found someone on episode seven during the school ball. When they were about to have sex on episode eight, however, her body betrayed her. She described it as her snatch “having a locked jaw.” Pretty serious yet funny stuff, right?

This condition is called vaginismus. What happens is that an involuntary muscle spasm occurs in a woman’s pelvic floor, resulting in painful or difficult intercourse. Sometimes, penetration becomes impossible! While there are physical factors, some of the most common causes of the problem is emotional, and that’s where a counsellor comes in.

Top Five Big Lessons from Netflix’s “Sex Education”

Now that we’ve got some of the funny stuff out of the way, let’s delve into the pieces of wisdom that the series shares with us. There are a lot of them, but we narrowed it down to the top five big lessons.

Never Believe Stereotypes

Ever since the first episode, “Sex Education” has done a swell job in smashing plenty of toxic stereotypes plaguing adolescents and adults alike. Here are just a few examples.

Most people initially thought that anal sex is just for gays. The series proves, however, that such a notion is far from reality. The very first scene of the whole series involves Aimee and Adam doing it from behind, and Aimee shows that she’s having fun with it. Jean’s first clients were a couple who had issues in bed, wherein the husband wanted his wife to use a strap-on and enter him anally.

Another is the misconception that two intimate guys are probably gays. The platonic relationship portrayed by Otis and Eric effectively quashes this prejudice. All throughout the series, they show that they’re very fond of each other but do not end up as a romantic couple. They are both comfortable in their own skin. They even go as far as dress up in drag in episode five, which neither really does normally. But the sweetest display of this brotherly love is during the ball in episode seven when Otis invites Eric to dance on the dancefloor. They enjoyed each other’s company and didn’t necessarily “fall in love.”

Perhaps the biggest stereotype that everyone battles with is the belief that everyone is having sex. In episode eight, Lily confesses to Otis that the reason she’s so desperate to have sex is because she doesn’t want to be the only virgin when she reaches her college years. She felt pressured because she thought everyone else were already shagging, when it wasn’t the case. This is probably one of the biggest lessons “Sex Education” gave us.

From wrong beliefs such as women being the only ones who fake orgasm, all men being expected to masturbate, and balls-deep BJs are better, the series shares enlightenment that we might not have learned at school.

Always Be on Top of Everything

School might have taught you this more than once or twice, but this show has driven the point home with utmost sense. When having sex, be sure to have a good head over your shoulders.

Before you even do the deed, you should always stay protected. Aimee and Adam were having sex while wearing a condom, and the show displayed this early on, driving that this should be the normal case. During their class, Maeve even showed Otis how to put on a condom on a plastic dick - something that not everyone might be aware of doing the first time.

But if you didn’t use protection, do you know how to handle the consequences? Maeve displayed this during the series. When she became pregnant after having sex with Jackson (Kedar Williams-Stirling), she was presented with two options - to keep the baby, or terminate her pregnancy. While she didn’t have the dramatic moment, it was clear in the narrative that the show was presenting her situation. Living alone and being a student who lives in a caravan, she barely makes ends meet - not an ideal environment for raising a kid. So she had to abort. As far as your options, it will vary from state to state, so learn the laws surrounding abortion in your area.

Also, in today’s digital age, it’s very easy to just snap a photo of your private parts without thinking. This was the situation that haunted Ruby (Mimi Keene) in episode five where she was blackmailed. This resulted in an impressive show of solidarity at the end of the episode, but that’s beside the point. While we do not want to victim-shame, this gives us an important learning moment. Similar to preparation before sex, you should be prepared when you expose yourself physically to others. If the possible repercussions bother you, then have a plan on what to do. It’s all about deciding, and this differs from one person to another.

Sex is About What Two People Want

This goes without saying, but it is important to note that two people must agree on what they want out of intercourse. This was made clear at the very start of episode two where a young couple were all over the place, literally! They couldn’t agree on whether they should turn the lights on or not, were flailing back and forth, and so on. The result? Well, they ended up injuring each other!

We’ve always emphasised that when it comes to sex, communication is key. Learn to listen to each other and agree to compromise with one another if needed. Talk to your partner and be honest about how you want things to go about. Once you do, then you’re more or less ready for sex.

Aside from agreeing, know that there’s always a way out when it comes to sex, and anything else for that matter. Netflix’s “Sex Education” weighed in heavily on consent, so much that there were at least two episodes revolving around it. In episode six, Otis and Lily decided that they should have a safe word in case one of them feels that the pressure and level of uncomfortability is escalating - well, for Otis, that is! In episode seven, Liam (Tom Mackley) was head over heels with a girl, so much that he was making advances that are rather creepy, such as a cake on her doorstep. This prompts the girl to say no. Otis counsels Liam that no means no, but then the latter thinks maybe it isn’t. In the end, Otis was able to knock some sense into his head, and that was an enlightening learning indeed.

Moreover, sex is about knowing what you want not just physically, but emotionally as well. If you remember episode four, lesbian couple Ruthie (Lily Newmark) and Tanya (Alice Hewkin) were having problems with their sex life. Otis suggested plenty of things, such as scissoring in the pool, but nothing seemed to work. It wasn’t until Otis discovers that Ruthie wasn’t in love with Tanya and only sees her as her best friend that he understands why sex doesn’t feel good for them.

Love and Prioritise Yourself

While we mentioned that sex involves two people, you can’t be part of that equation or any relationship at all until you’ve learned to prioritise yourself and address your own needs. This was shown throughout the series, making it one of the biggest messages of the show.

Otis himself is the obvious teacher of this lesson. He begins the series as an adolescent boy who has not even masturbated at all. While he was coaxed by Eric and his environment to get it done and over with, he resists as he still has underlying issues. He even musters the strength to tell his mum about the issue, but explains he will handle it on his own. It was only when he was ready that he came - well, that was the idea during the last episode.

Also, the series tackled the issue of body positivity and loving yourself. In episode two, the girl who was trying to have sex with his boyfriend wanted to have the lights off because she felt ugly. It wasn’t until she realised that she had to love her perceived flaws that she finally became confident and thus was ready to have sex. Another was with Aimee in episode six when she finally touched herself. That was the only time she knew what she wanted from sex, not what she thought her partner wanted. The same level of self love applied to Ruby at the end of episode five when she owned up to the photo of her vagina - no regrets, no insecurities.

Finally, “Sex Education” teaches us that self acceptance is important. Eric, after being attacked by homophobes in episode five, retreated in his shell and became an angry teen. It wasn’t until he learned to be comfortable in who he was and attended the school ball in drag in episode seven that he truly became happy. As a matter of fact, one episode after, he hooked up with, drum roll please, Adam! Shocker of the season!

Sex Education is a Continuous Process

Last, but certainly not the least, “Sex Education” tells us that just like everything else, learning is a lifelong process. It’s not something that’s stale and is constant for everyone.

For example, in episode two, while Otis tried to give sex advice based on what he knows, the generic approach didn’t work. That’s because it varies from one person to another, and it depends on the unique situation a person is in. It was only when he listened to his clients that he did a good job guiding them. In so doing, he learned more about sexuality himself.

But where does sex education start? The series shows that it begins at home. When young Otis saw his dad having intercourse with a client, he asks his mum about what happened. Without trying to give false information, Jean explained how sex worked. That was Otis’ first dose of sex education. And as he grew, Jean, in the tear-jerking final episode, told Otis that he’s not going to have all the answers at once, but will get there as he goes along his own path.

Whew! You could probably tell that we enjoyed the series. And there’s plenty to love about it as it opens the youth’s eyes to the reality of sex education. We, at Randy Fox, will also endeavour to empower you with such lessons through our items and our stories.

What Netflix Sex Education Has Taught Us Infographic - Randy Fox