Plain Talk, “Anal-ese”

In private sessions with climax in mind, you have probably already discovered that there are other regions of the body beside your reproductive organs that are capable of producing incredible sensations when stimulated. Nipples, ears, neck and feet are all common erogenous zones that create fantasy. Most people also know their anus is also very sensitive.

That’s right, the bum, arse, pooh-shoot, or if you prefer, the backdoor entryway! Most people will discover their backside as an extremely sensitive area of the body that rightly deserves attention. The troubles with beginning an honest exploration of anal fantasy are the taboos and disinformation associated with it.


Is There Anything Horrible About Anal Play?

The short answer is NO! The long answer involves an explanation.

Both men and women have radically different reproductive complexes, but strangely similar auxiliary sex organs. Just about everyone loves skin contact, rubbing, nuzzling and behaviours associated with lovely sex. This also includes that often overlooked area opposite of the traditional side of sex. Every person has an anus which functions in similar fashion and contains an entirely new realm of possibilities.

Centuries of myth have taught people falsely that the anus is a dirty region of the body. Sex involving the anus must be the desire of deviants and those who are misled in some way. The truth is, the anus is a region with an extremely dense concentration of nerves that aid in sexual stimulation, and all that is required for anal play is a little knowledge and bravado.


What Is The First Step To Enjoying Anal Play?

If you are contemplating exploration of sexual activity that involves the anus, you already know yourself better than anyone else. The first step afterward is finding a partner that is willing to help explore this activity at your preferred pace.

For some people, anal play is natural. For others, it is a long journey of trust and compassion which requires patience and attention paid to the feelings and desires of a partner. Anal sex is neither straight, gay, male, nor female. It is an activity that can lead to a vastly expounded understanding of the carnal likes and dislikes of the individual.


What About The Butt?

For men, the anal region is a secluded and prized area of privacy. To allow penetration through the anal sphincter is to expose oneself without reserve. For a woman, many consider the anus as a "secondary vagina" that is only accessible through ultimate trust, comfort and the acquired need to please a partner with all the “tools” available.

For both sexes, anal play is the difference between casual penetrative sex and intercourse which reaches into the core of each partner’s soul. It’s the last frontier. The anus is the access point at which all sexual boundaries are conquered and complete liberation is achieved. Anal sex has little to do with orientation, morale, experience and personality. It has everything to do with enjoying sex free from a sense of hesitation, reserve, embarrassment, or judgment.


OK, But How Should A First Timer Begin?

The penis and vagina are self-lubricating. This is for good reason. These organs are responsible for the majority of human sexual contact and the transport of precious reproductive materials. The anus does not produce a natural lubrication. Though anal sex is pleasurable, is requires a little help. Any activity, alone or with a partner should include a high quality lubricant. Unhindered entry is key to anal fun.

The possibilities of solo anal play are endless and subject to your personal thresholds when it comes to how you progress. When a partner is involved, an evolution must occur.


How Is Partnered Anal Sex Made Enjoyable?

The first step is trust! If partners agree to engage in anal activity, it breaks down a psychological barrier that would otherwise make this type of intercourse intolerable.

The foreplay is up to the partners involved, but the first step should be careful touch and proper preparation. Gentle massage and contact should be initiated by both partners. Application of lubricants, verbal communication and physical teasing will relax the person whose anus will be penetrated.

Conditioning for full penetration is paramount. Use a single finger to relax the anus and rush blood to the tissue surface. A few minutes of massage will produce a small “gape” which signals a readiness for a larger object. Time spent with a dildo, or vibrator is next. As the anus accepts an object with greater circumference, physiological changes will occur like flush skin, heavy breathing and leg and torso relaxation.

After preparation, an anus which is ready to accept a phallic object will look plump and active in a respirative sense. This means, it will pump and engorge with the pace of the person’s breathing and motion. Entry to the anal cavity is now ready to begin.


Taking It Anally.

Once anal sex has begun, the number one way to continue is to relax.

Women should always be aware of the lubrication quotient. Sometimes an excited male cannot feel your need. This is when it is time to take control of the pace. If you are properly lubricated, all adjustments can be made.

Men should relax their entire body and direct the tip of the penis or toy toward the prostate. This can be accomplished with a combination of torso rolling and a gentle “pushing out,” akin to the progress of a bowel movement.

First time anal experiences should be taken slowly and with a generous layer of fine lubricant and protective devices. There is no better way to learn how to best enjoy anal sex, than to slowly introduce the action into your regimen with the help of a partner that you trust.


What Should Happen After The First Time?

If anal sex is enjoyable for you, continue to experiment with the details of your unique sexual make-up with an array of sex toys. Try different sized vibrators, dildos, Prostate massagers and anal stimulators to zero-in on what types of anal activity brings you the most satisfaction.

As you learn how your unique body configuration translates anal stimulation you will then be able to take on more advanced methods and toys. Never push yourself beyond what’s comfortable and safe. Always make yourself anally available to partners you trust.

It takes time and desire, but becoming an anal sex expert is worth it! You have discovered that your entire body is capable of producing pleasure. Now, have the discipline and drive to follow that desire in a safe and appealing way. Enjoy!