How Do Sex Toys Affect Your Relationship?

People celebrate February in various ways. It can be through romantic dinners, breathtaking sunset views, relaxing escapades from the city bustle - but one thing is almost the same with everyone; the day usually ends with a steamy act of physical love. To amp up the heat, some have introduced adult toys to the equation. That’s kinky and all, but how do sex toys affect your relationship?

Do Sex Toys Have Any Effect to Your Relationship?

To cut the story short, yes! Adult toys do have a certain degree of influence to the intimacy of two people. Now the ringing question is, does it move the needle positively or negatively? Let’s find out.

The Good

There are plenty of reasons why using sex toys with your partner can make the whole experience better, and that a good thing. Couples benefit from adult toys because of three important things - exquisite foreplay, comfort, and a satisfying orgasm.

Ticklers and Teasers - Randy FoxBefore the actual act, do you simply undress and begin humping? Of course not! You have to ease in into the moment through foreplay. If you’ve already tried every trick in the book, why not use sex toys for a fresh experience? There are ticklers and teasers that could hit spots both you and your partner never thought of exploring before, and the fact you’re doing it on each other is more than a welcome bonus.

Now let’s start talking comfort. Aren’t you tired of the usual missionary style, but find that other challenging and rather athletic positions might just give you a bad case of backache? Instead of sex becoming an intimate bond, it becomes a tedious chore. With the use of items like the Bondage 4 Strap Position Enhancer, however, you may begin trying things you’ve never done before without accidents that could dampen the mood.

And of course, the climax of it all, the big O. Now let’s face it, not everyone hits orgasm at the same time. That could be frustrating for both parties, and the person who still hasn’t climaxed may feel cheated. With the help of sex toys for couples like the We-Vibe Sync Couple's Vibrator, you can adjust the sensation, allowing both of you to get to seventh heaven together.

To summarize, the good thing about adding sex toys into your relationship is the fact that you’re exploring new ways together, thus you’re constantly finding out how to take care of each other’s sexual needs. That’s a healthy thing! According to a 2016 study conducted by David Frederick, Ph.D., passion and sexual satisfaction tend to decline as time goes by, but this can be addressed by proactively working to maintain it. This can be done through mood setting, sexual communication, and a lot more - things that adult toys can help you with.

The Bad

Like everything else, sex toys are double-edged swords. They can be beneficial to your relationship, but it can possibly ruin it as well when used incorrectly. How so?

In an online forum, people weighed in on the cons of using adults toys. To summarize, the community agreed that it’s the person, not the item, that ruins the relationship. When someone uses a sex toy to replace his/ her partner when it comes to sexual pleasure, or when the other begins to feel intimidated or inadequate, that’s when the problem comes in.

Interestingly enough, several studies confirm that those two factors are indeed true. The dampened relationship caused by the use of sex toys can be due to several factors, such as not understanding why the item is needed, or what the partner’s role is with the adult toy added in the equation. You’d ask several questions to yourself - “Am I not good enough?” “What if I’m no longer needed?” “What am I here for?” Yes, the mind is a dangerous instigator of doubt, folks!

How to Introduce Sex Toys into the Equation

While there are plenty of benefits, that one, pressing disadvantage can becoming daunting and frightening. So how do you go around it if you’d like to give it a go? Here are a few tips.

Start Communicating

Two Intimate People - Randy FoxCommunication is the foundation of every relationship. When you can talk about anything in a non-threatening environment, it becomes an exchange of ideas. The same is true when it comes to talking about adding adult toys into the mix. You can say something like, “I’ve always wondered what the buzz is about with this new vibrator on the market.” Leave an open-ended statement and let your partner chime in. That should start a healthy conversation between the two of you.

Don’t Be Uptight About It

In relation to communicating, you should realise that this is just a normal request. It’s a topic that’s exciting, but you have to put it out there like it’s no big deal. If your partner agrees, good! If not, simply ask where the hesitation is coming from. Don’t rehearse too much, or else your partner will know. He/ she can smell fear!

Assure Your Partner that He/ She’s in Control

If you remember, one of the common hesitations when it comes to introducing sex toys in the relationship is how your mate fits in the equation. That shouldn’t be the case, because it should be the item that does the adjusting. Explain that you’re not using the toy on yourself, rather you want him/ her to use it on you. For couples’ toys, say that it’s for the both of you. That should give your partner the confidence that he/ she’s not and will never be the third wheel.

Go Shopping Together

Your partner already agreed to give sex toys a shot. So how do you make sure that he/ she’s part of the whole process? Shop for toys together! It would be awkward to have the conversation, and then once he/ she agrees, you bring out a toy right in his/ her face. Now it would feel like you manipulated him/ her into it! Make sure he/ she is part of the decision-making, and that this is a fun ride.

Start Small

If it’s your first time, it becomes counterproductive and frightening when you whip out something like an 8-inch, realistic looking dildo. That would intimidate anyone! Start slow, start small. For example, you may want to pick a 12-Function Silicone Randy Butterfly Vibrator. It doesn’t look like any body part, doesn’t mimic anything, and is a rather discreet but effective toy.

In conclusion, sex toys are there to spice things up in your relationship. It’s a tool that should rekindle the passion between the two of you, so use it wisely!

How Do Sex Toys Affect Your Relationship Infographic